Worm:

Last night we went to Shine, a prophetic worship night at Vanguard . Billy, who attends the school, told us non-Vanguardians about it 3 weeks ago and when we went for the first time, we were met by the Holy Spirit.  Needless to say, we got ROCKED.  My new sister, Charlotte, is a STUD and has prayed over many, myself included, who have then received their prayer language.  I still am in awe at the fact that God gives us a language unique to His ears.  (Side note: If you don't know what a prayer language is, pray into it, man!  God will meet you there. Basically, it's an utterance that is not confined to any particular language.  It gets confused with praying in tongues, though it is different because it is not meant to be understood by anyone except God.  It opens up new wells of love between God and us that are stored in us, waiting to be unearthed.  Beautiful, right?) Continuing on... Last night was round 2 of Shine and dang, God is crazy.  As the time passed from 9:30pm-1:00am, my God became BIGGER and BIGGER.  I went from sitting on the back of the couch ... to being crumpled up on the couch ... to standing up ... to sitting on the floor ... to kneeling ... to bowing ... and finally, to being face down, outstretched on the ground.   


From start to finish, God revealed/said these things to me:
-read Isaiah 41
-where are your eyes fixed?
-why do you care so much about and seek for approval from other people?
-not everyone is looking at you! 
-stop asking for 180˚ changes! be content in the journey. nothing is wrong with you for being in a process. "It only takes two 180˚ turns to wind right back up where you started." - Bill Dogtrom via Billy  


Once I found myself laying flat on the ground, God started speaking this section of Isaiah 41 to me:

¹³ For I hold you by your right hand—
I, the Lord your God.
And I say to you,
‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you.

¹⁴ Though you are a lowly worm, O Jacob,
don’t be afraid, people of Israel, 
for I will help you.

I am the Lord, your Redeemer.
I am the Holy One of Israel.’

I'm a worm!?


Then, the chorus to "Cielo" by Phil Wickham started playing in my head:


Captured by the beauty of it all
So I fall to my knees
But I can't bow low enough 
I can't bow low enough
At the vision of You my God 
I can't bow low enough
I can't bow low enough
At the vision of You my God
I can't hold it all inside 


Yes, I am a worm.
Being flat on the ground is a very humbling position.  
There isn't much lower one can go.  
Well, unless you're a worm. 
God met me there on the floor. 
...Funny. (with sarcasm)
I wanted to cry because that's what one is supposed to do, right?
"I should be crying.  This is when people cry usually." I thought.
"No." God said.
"You don't have to cry to show me anything. I know. Let me be unique."
Oh. 
Ok then. 
Simple enough. 
"Now, stand and sing with joy:

'HALLELUJAH!'

-God Be Praised-

So I stood. 

I sang.

I know that my God is big.

AMEN.